A turn-on is defined in one dictionary as: something causing excitement or stimulating interest. I'd take it further. It's transitioning from one state of being to another. A different dimension.
5 turn-on ideas:
- allow plenty of time - start your date three hours early, out somewhere
- eat some very good chocolates and taste each other's lips
- fill up the tub with hot water, and both of you climb in to soak when he gets home
- prepare your environment - fancy sheets, candles, music
- massage gently with favorite oils, nice and slow... maybe with a blindfold or two
These are ideas and variations from the book Ethical Slut, which I've referenced before. A lifetime or longer-term partner has a different feel in some ways than a shorter-term or one-time partner.
In exploratory exercises with your partner, languaging is important. Change your language, change your world. Instead of telling your partner, "turn me on," you might say, "let's find my turn-on," as well as visiting those known areas. It frees you both of alot of blame and responsibility, and frees you to enjoy.
WOW INTERESTING READING,SHOULD I BUY THIS BOOK I really like the phrase "turn me on, you might say, let's find my turn-on," ::))
ReplyDeleteYes, I think that this book is a great one, obviously! It has a lot of great specific ideas.
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