paid rape

A friend of ours did some porn shoots this last year. He's a cutie and a hottie (not the guy above). The company flew him to Texas where he did a couple of shoots. Problem is, now he has a hard time getting an erection, for the first time in his life, in his early 20's. He doesn't like to talk about it, but I don't like some of the things he explained about his experience.

First off, they didn't use condoms. The guys are frequently tested, and are asked to only have sex with their screen partners in between periods of testing. But how archaic is that? And how trustworthy? To ask a guy not to wear protection while having anal sex, as a matter of policy for a company making money off these guys, is irresponsible, regardless of the measures.

Secondly, he described a lot of painful experiences. The guys were hot, but he felt pressured to do things he normally didn't, and faster than he normally did them - like bottoming aggressively quickly. Talk about painful, and tearing. I'd call that paid rape. He's younger and doesn't speak up as much for himself. It is a predatory - or at least thoughtless - company that does not care for the well-being of its models off whom it makes money. I've seen scenes on other websites where the guy bottoming is wincing, grimacing, and pushing the top guy away, and the top just grabs and thrusts deeper. Not cool. Yeah, you could say he's getting paid. But no amount of money or argument justifies non-consensual hurtful sex. It's sex that a guy limps away from, that wounds his future sex-making experiences.

Of course, looking at the picture above, I wouldn't want anyone to judge me by some of the faces I pull while in intense sexual experience :). Just that I think one can tell whether the guy is actually having a good time, or whether he is in pain, or bored, or just enduring the thing. I've seen experiences on paid porn websites which seem like paid rape to me. Rape is defined as the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse.

A lot of thoughtless porn companies use models for a handful of high-intensity sessions, then discard them, in my view, once the problems they created start manifesting. Like our friend, who now is sensitive to pain and has erection problems, problems likely psychological from a not-so-laughable trauma. Hopefully he's still clean physically. Of course, it's not just porn that does this, but professional American football, and other industries - a tangeant for another day.

Thirdly he and others have said that the "fun" is actually a lot of work... posing for the right camera angles, sustaining stamina for countless stop-and-goes for photographs or producer directions, etc. It's not so much your idea of good sex, but the producer's ideas about what looks like good sex on camera. It seems to kill the camaraderie between you and the other guy(s) and closeness, and it takes a unique guy to be able to withstand all of the demands and still sustain his sexiness.

I DO think there is a place for porn. I love it. In the same breath I'm often bored by it. Or appalled by it. Though we all have our edge as to what we like to see or experience, I would like to see more ethically responsible companies and shoots. Even porn that teaches us something. I think there is an opportunity for more creative - awake - beautiful porn that teaches and gives value.