"Suck it!" he said. Problem was, I wasn't really feeling it... nor the fact that he thought an order was acceptable. I respond very poorly to orders, and much better to requests, as I imagine most people do, sex or not. But being gracious whenever possible is also good, so I just smiled.
Sexual behavior is often demonstrative of some of our underlying beliefs. You can learn a lot about a person here. And a person can learn a lot about life in this arena.
A request is a suggestion with an option to do or not. A demand insists in one outcome. A request and a demand might sound alike at first: "Sweetheart, will you wash the dishes in the sink?" If it's a demand, non-compliance results in punishment of some sort - maybe the silence treatment, no sex for you, whatever. A request makes itself known but does not insist on only one outcome.
Even when we get really comfortable with someone its still important to make requests and not demands. Some people call this non-violent communication. Making a request implies that we might not get what we want, or we may. It's still really worthwhile because at very least our partner (and self) know what we want!
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